Clarity is Key

Please note: Submitting a resume to ********* Careers implies that you are interested in a position(s), but does not mean you are an applicant. Although it differs throughout our various companies, you are usually not considered an applicant until you have been contacted by a Human Resources representative. Then, you may be asked to begin the designated application process, which may involve an interview and/or job-related testing. ************ Inc. and its affiliated companies is an equal opportunity employer and supports workforce diversity.

Isn't that what Monistat is for?

Hi ***************,

Thank you for your interest in joining ***********. At this time, we have successfully made a hire for the International Marketing Coordinator. The hiring managers in that department gave priority to internal applicants for that position, given that as a company, ******* is cultivating a culture of growth from within.

I will keep your resume on file so that you may be considered for similar opportunities as they arise. In the meantime, please feel free to check our available openings via our website, **********************.

Best Regards,

****** ********

I'm still horrified by the cultivation of a culture of growth. Usually that means it's time to clean out the fridge.

Bitch Please: Rejection Face as an Art Form

Blair Waldorf is having none of whatever it is you're serving. None of it.

You Just Don't Fit The Cookie Cutter

Hi **********,



Thank you for attending the Guest Services Hiring Fair on Tuesday night. We appreciate your interest in our team. Although we were impressed with your background, we have decided to move forward with other candidates who more closely match our qualifications for this position. I truly wish you the best of luck in your job search and I am looking forward to our paths crossing again in the future.





Sincerely,

*********

You Were Rejected, But Check Out How Cool Our Technology Is!

Dear ********,

I am sending you this email as you either applied directly to ************ for the position of Executive Assistant, Job Number ******** or your resume was in our database and you were considered for this position.

We wanted to inform you that this position has been filled.

We would still like to maintain your resume/CV in our electronic database located in the U.S., hosted by a third party provider.

The database allows us to match the skills on your resume/CV against the requirements of other open positions. If a relevant match is made, a business representative will contact you to discuss the opportunity.

By initially sending in your resume/CV, you consented to your resume/CV being processed and maintained in our electronic database consistent with ********* Candidate Data Protection Standards. You may review these guidelines at our website. If you no longer consent, please send an email to ***************** requesting that your resume be deleted from the database. Please provide your full first name, last name, mailing address and home telephone number. Any emails sent to this address for any other purpose other than the above will not be responded to and will be discarded. Alternatively, you may send a letter to the address provided in ********* Candidate Data Protection Standards.

If you would like to know what other positions are available at ******, please visit our website. Job opportunities that are available and open to external candidates will be posted on this site. You can easily set up a job agent and be notified via email when available job openings that meet your criteria are posted to the site. Simply click on Expanded Search and then Job Agent and follow the instructions.

Once again, we thank you for your interest in ********* and we wish you every success in your job search.

Sincerely,

******** Human Resources

Has anyone ever told you?

your art sucks.

Rejection Are Serious Business

NOTICE OF RESULTS

ISF Ineligible - You did not meet the selective placement factor requirement for this position.

ID You do not meet the minimum education and/or experience requirements for this specialty and grade.

PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL MESSAGE. IT IS AUTOMATICALLY GENERATED.

For additional information, please refer to the vacancy announcement for this position.

The Many Get Rejected

Dear Marketing Assistant applicant,

Thank you for your interest in working at the *******************. I regret to inform you that the Marketing Assistant position has been filled. I know many of you applied a month or two ago, but it was a long process to find the right person. In any case, I just wanted to let you know that the search has been closed.

Best wishes in your job search, if you are still looking.

-********

The best part of this letter is how utterly impersonal (all of you many people who applied for this job) it is but then the author tries to add a personal touch--"if you're still looking."

RSVP Rejected

Hi ******…

I’m sorry… We’ve closed the list for now but have started a (still short) waitlist. I”ll add you to it and if we get dropouts, I’ll contact you and give you more details as we work them out.

Thanks much and hopefully we’ll get in touch soon.

You can't even get accepted into a wine tasting. That's how much rejection you've just been served. Instead of wine.

Rejection in Popular Culture and Local News, aka... WTF?

1. Look! A rejection hotline! So you can give someone your number and they can call it, and feel like a complete loser! It's world famous since 2001! It's basically in kindergarten.
   
2. A Pasadena Arts & Culture commissioner resigned because of a rejected public art proposal. Is Pasadena anti-art or anti-bad-art? You be the judge.
   

Rejection hurts everywhere, people.